playing on the B.A.D. team

For the second year Andrew has played on the B.A.D baseball team.  Beyond All Disabilities that is. There is nothing  bad about this team. These kids and adults have fun. We have quite a bit of fun as spectators too. I cannot say enough good things about the couple that coach the team. Mike and Cheryl are amazing. They make the game fun. They have so much patience….

Last night I saw that patience first hand. Drew has taken a liking to catching. Mainly because it doesn’t require running I think. When Coach Mike tried explaining you only catch when your team is in the outfield Drew didn’t take it well. He totally melted down. It is always the silly things that cause the biggest meltdowns. Coaches Mike and Cheryl were so patient with him. Trying to reason with him and get him back into the game. It was so nice to sit back and let someone else who actually understands how to deal with a child like him do it.  For years I have had to be so vigilant and watch as teachers without a clue pushed every one of my child’s buttons and pushed him into more and more trouble. It has been so hard to not lose my cool with these people. to maintain my cool and contain my inner momma bear.  

So today I say thank you to the coaches for giving me this opportunity to sit back and just be a regular parent for a change.


Heavy on my mind

I am reading House Rules by Jodi Picoult. It is a story about a young adult/child with AS accused of murder. The character really incorporates all the stereotypes of an Aspie which in my limited experience is quite unusual. However the possibilities are realistic and I might add just a bit terrifying. The boy cannot tolerate being touched and so as you can imagine the process of being processed is melt down inducing.

AK is certainly not as effected as this character but the story has me thinking. Things I have never considered are now in my mind. It never occurred to me that the hallmarks of AS (no eye contact, flat voice, literal thinking, obsessive interests, lack of social understanding…) might also be considered indicators of guilt in a criminal investigation.

Putting my child in the books scenario makes me feel helpless. I like to think that there would be more understanding if the powers that be knew the defendant was autistic but experience tells me that is not always true. That is one of the hardest parts of AS, AK looks like any other child, in fact he seems very mature for his age. At least that is the case until something triggers his sensory issues or he feels he is being treated unfairly. When this happens look out because my 20 yr old acting 11 yr old suddenly becomes a 3 yr old acting 11 yr old…(does that even make sense?). The contrast is mind-blowing and people cannot really process what has happened. It is quite easy to lump him in as an undisciplined bratty child.  Add to this the fact that the only way to help him out of this situation is a cool down period. The more you try to reason with him the more escalated the situation becomes. His own father has trouble understanding this concept how can I ever expect those who don’t know him to understand?

I am only partway through this novel but it really has my mind working overtime.